Family: 5 reasons why we should not shame full time housewives

Modern ideas seen to think being a full housewife as a derogatory duty that demeans women.

For most parts of global history, men were given the harder duties, men fought wars and women were seen as weaker, home keepers who have to be protected.

Incredibly, some tribes didn’t perceive women as anything more than child rearing engines that should only remain at home a gossip.

 

Though history documents some strong women that rooted against he norm like Efurunoye Tinubu, Efunsetan Aniwura and other female warriors who led inter-tribal wars and were commanders of men.

In Italian history, the Tigress of Forli was an heiress who led men and had more command and authority that her brothers. Nonetheless, most women had to conform to societal rules or get brandished outlaws.

It was not an easy world. Thus, women had to conform or get cut out and no one wants to be alone. It continued like that through history till women were used as objects to seal contracts and deals.

Child rearing became symbolic with the era of undermining women.

It is thus understandable why women still see other women who choose or have to be full housewives as nothing but liabilities conforming to age old standards that undermine and limit women who have been proven to be capable of exploits.

Who is a full housewife?

 

These are stay-at-home mothers who prefer home-making to employment or paid labour in the capitalist sense.

It is not just women either. A lot of men ignorantly say, “I cannot marry a full housewife.” The only reason I can think of for such is lack of critical thought and lack of empathy.

Nonetheless, we also have to understand the men. More times than not, income has to come from two parties to actually, sufficiently sustain a family with children, as is usually the case.

On the grander scale, only a few men can sufficiently handle the demands of their family independently. These reality scares people who haven’t the means to really carry the weight independently.

Hence, they are vehemently against marrying women who really want to stay at home and only take care of their children.

 

Despite the foregoing, being a full housewife is still a legitimate job that is even harder that a lot of jobs. It involves chores, child rearing, nurturing, teaching and impacting positively. It is hard and not a job for everybody.

If we find those who can actually do it, it’s best to equally celebrate them. They are nurturing the next generation. It is an exploit that a lot of people would fail at.

For the following, we the have to careful to not shame women who choose to be full housewives;

1.) Child rearing is as hard as any job

Asides the job of taking care of these children, you also need energy to cater to their excesses and trouble making antics. As well all know, talking gets hard, let alone shouting and scolding all day.

This job is sometimes dicey because to properly lead a child, you need great sensitivity to properly impact a child not to falter or fall off. The world is hard enough to make a child derail from imbibed standards.

Some children have strong backgrounds, but falter in the harsh world and show ideals averse to ones they were taught growing up.

It is then a tough job, alongside the energy required to make meals, cater to the home, go to the market and sometimes, still have sex when needed — despite having a maid, yes.

The job is also round the clock while an office job sometimes stops. Women who love this job should be applauded, not shamed.

Someone has to do the job of raising the kids on the home font and keep the house running, while others are on the field doing capitalist exploits. We can all be great in this one world.

2.) You need trust in the person handling your home

In truth, we hear incredible stories about irresponsible or downright improper maids who end up either corrupting your children or robbing you or sleeping with partners and spouses.

The world is wild. If a mother or wife decides to take up that job, why is she being shamed? Women are maternal, meaning they are calmer and more pragmatic than men.

Women are generally also better planners than men, even those employed. Why then are shaming a women for choosing a different type of efficiency?

Could it be that we have become too accustomed to empowerment that we have neglected pragmatism? While nothing is ever perfect, it sure looks like it.

3.) Post-partum, it is usually hard for mothers to leave their children

The natural bond between a mother and a child is no secret. It is common knowledge that everything changes in women when a child becomes a part of it. They give everything to that child, if needs be.

They want to be there every time to take care of it and make sure it is fine. Thus, some women just grow accustomed to that role and psychologically fit into the home setting and the safety of it.

While for some, it is just a phase, others make a conscious decision as for them, nothing else matters than that child; not money or jobs, or even promotion. Should we then shame them for choosing human life over capitalism?

Yes, capitalism fosters our system and it is the reason that women has any chance at all to raise that kid he way she wants. But then, is anything more valuable than human life? That is food for thought.

4.) A core part of feminism is choice and prerogative

Women were robbed of freedom to express themselves by men for so long. Their rights were absorbed under thought regimes and most were forced to conform rather than prosper.

Is it not the priority of the constantly evolving world to have a choice and be allowed to stay with it. Unless of course, that choice could harm the family. Everyone needs to be responsible.

But then, if the husband can handle it. He might need to reason with her.

5.) Employment is hard anyways

The Labor market keeps shrinking and unwelcoming of prospects. It gets increasingly hard to get jobs. Why then should we force any women to remain in that toxic space when a greater job lies at home.

It is easier to trust the mother than the nanny.

However, we need more female participation in the upper reaches of the working class to pick up where people Sheryl Sandberg and Oprah Winfrey left off.

Let’s strive for balance, but generally, not shame homemakers.